“Now it came to pass, when he had been there a long time, that Abimelech king of the Philistines looked through a window, and saw, and there was Isaac showing endearment to Rebekah his wife.” Genesis 26:8 (NKJV).

The role of intimacy within the boundaries of marriage can never be overemphasised. The Holy Scriptures admonish married men accordingly: “Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the Sun…” (Ecc.9:9a). In other words, both spouses in a Christian marriage have not only the right but also the responsibility of enjoying each other within their marital union, hence the essence of intimacy. Worthy of note is the fact that this intimacy doesn’t in any way apply to people outside wedlock for boundaries are designed to protect institutions.

God’s Position regarding nuptial intimacy is so clear in the Bible that even newlyweds were mandated to go on a year long honeymoon, exempted from work, business and any other engagement which could undermine the bonding process: “When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken” (Deut. 24:5).

The following are some tips to enhance intimacy in marriage:

  1. Verbal expression of affection: This involves professing your love for each other, whispering “sweet-nothings” to each other etc.
  2. Words of affirmation: These include saying “I love you” as many times as possible and reinforcing your spouse’s ego or self-esteem with sincere compliments such as “You look gorgeous” and “You’re my treasure, my priority.”
  3. Use of pet names: Calling your spouse “darling” or “sweetheart” doesn’t cancel your Eternal Life.
  4. Reading and watching godly romantic material together: This helps spice up the marital bond. It is important to note that this doesn’t include pornography.
  5. Exploring sexual innovation: Spirituality doesn’t rule out sexuality and involves keeping intercourse exciting within Biblical Boundaries (see Heb. 13:4).
  6. Attending seminars and outings together: Such wonderful seminars include Couple’s Classic.
  7. Recreational Compatibility: A couple that plays together stays together.


Heavenly Father, thank You for the gift of a loving spouse. O Lord, please grant us the grace to enjoy our marriage and may the sweetness therein never run out in Jesus’ Mighty Name. Amen.

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